So there is a girl, who cry herself to sleep every single night, "I am strong enough to face this." said her. But then, she cries. She can't handle it alone. Hoping for someone who is willing to lend a shoulder. To lend a finger, to wipe those tears. To lend a mouth to say, "Everything is going to be fine." But no, she can't find anyone. She hides her feelings to herself. She never expect that life would be this hard. Unexpected burden. She's hoping to be a kid again. She can never hold her tears. It will eventually fall. Her heart was broken into thousands of pieces. She is too tired to face the same shit. She got no powers left to stand on her own feet. She just need some strength. She loves a guy. But he hurts her. She won't give up on him. She loves him so much that she forgot to love herself at the first place. She reads random quotes on tumblr and cry herself while scrolling. Wondering why must life be this hard. Facing the same shits every day. Hoping there is someone who will always be there when she has a problem. But it all doesn't seems to matter anymore because she knows, at the end, people will go without her knowing. She cries again. She is just an innocent girl who fought everything for everyone but no one ever appreciate it. She is totally fine with that.

So, i watched "Eat, pray, love." What a great movie. Such an inspiration to those who feels like giving up with their life. The movie taught me to not give up in my life. There are few quotes that relates with my story. One of the quotes is, "Everything falls apart, my dear. The only thing permanent in life is family." It somehow taught me to appreciate my family while they are still breathing. Another line is, "For the first time, i'm afraid the person next to me; which refers to the person he loves the most, will be the one who wants to leave." What a beautiful line. It reminds me of him. I am so afraid of losing him. At one point, i cried. I was thinking to talk to him and say "if you want to leave me soon, just leave me now. I'm afraid that if i'm madly in love with you, i couldn't let you go. Cause at that time, you are mine. I won't let you go by then." But no. I don't have the guts to say that to him. I don't want him to leave. I begged him to stay. I couldn't bear to see myself in depressed. I couldn't bear to take all the little pieces of my broken heart. I miss you. I miss how we used to talk on the phone for hours long. Yes, i miss that, sweet heart. We both changed. Why did we change? Why, sweet heart? I miss the old you. I miss the old us. Everything has changed.

He walked into her life. He loves her with all his heart. He treats her the right way. He is so in love with her. He thinks that they could be together, forever. He wants to get married with her. He wants to be her husband. One day, he said. He is so worry that he is not suitable for her. He doesn't want to lose her. His life would be so fucked up without her. Incomplete, he said. He thinks that she is perfect enough to him. He asked her to not ever leave him. He is so afraid of losing her. Like, too too afraid. He tries to make everything looks perfect in her eyes. Trying to get her attention. He is a shy person. But he tries to get comfortable with her. Tries to get use with her. Day by day, step by step. Trying so hard to be a part of her life. His love towards her is uncountable. It cannot be describe in words. How precious is his love. There are a lot of girls who are waiting for him. But no. He still choose her. For him, she looks perfectly perfect in his eyes. "You are mine now and my life is completely complete." said him to his heart lover. He hopes that she would not leave him for any reason. He loves her more than what the girl's expected.